Breastfeeding is easy. Right? I don't think that there is anything more untrue! I have already posted about our issues with a lip tie and how painful it was before that. But, it does not end there. There are so many moms who try to and can't for so many different reasons. I wish more moms knew about lip ties and that more hospitals and doctors checked for them, but that is only the tip of the breastfeeding iceberg. Some moms have to, or choose to, go the pumping route, but that is just as difficult, if not harder. Pumping does not empty as well or as quickly as a baby does, which makes it more time consuming. On top of cleaning parts, pumping on a schedule, making sure to get new parts when you need them and finding a place to pump (which can also be harder than finding a place to feed because you often need an outlet), you ALSO still have a LO to take care of.
But, back to breastfeeding and the things no one told me about it.
One thing that pumping has over feeding straight from the breast is that you know how much they are getting and how much you are producing. Several times my daughter has acted like she wants more. My boobs are soft, I can't hand express anything and I am sure they are empty. But, yet she is fussy and crying and luckily we keep around formula as a backup. I try to make sure we always have some pumped milk fresh or frozen and ready, but it is hard to find time to pump when she eats every 2-3 hours and I am exhausted by the time she goes to sleep (which luckily is through the night, but I go to sleep when she does, so I am NOT staying awake another hour to pump, lol). I also make sure to have oatmeal and Mothers Milk tea every day. When I pump, I get between 6-7 oz usually, less when I have my period (which yes, I already got back even though I was told I wouldn't if I breastfeed and she is only 3 months old). I am a "just-enougher". Not an over or under producer, but just enough to feed my baby what she needs. This is a good thing, but does make it hard to build up a "stash".
We try not to give formula, but sometimes it is necessary. One day, my LO just WOULD NOT latch! She screamed and cried every time I offered her the boob. She just did NOT want my milk. After 8 or more hours of not eating for more than a minute, Dad finally offered her a bottle. We were out of milk in the fridge, so formula was all we had. We started with 2 oz, which she chugged down in no time. At this point, I started to cry. I knew she was hungry, but why wouldn't she let me feed her? And she just cried most of the day. I was definitely producing, but she didn't want it. I got nervous that this may be the end of our BF journey. Was she done with it? Was it not enough. She drank between 5 and 6 oz in under 5 minutes. I left her with dad who finished feeding her and put her to bed. It was an emotional night. Luckily, the next morning she latched right back on and it was a normal day again. I still do not know what happened or why, but this is just part of the BF life that no one tells you. Not every day is easy, even if you are able to feed this way.
Oh, and do you want to also know what you NEVER hear about??? The fact that for many moms, BF has a laxative effect. The urge to poop while breastfeeding can be awful. Sometimes it comes on so quick, I have to stop and run to the bathroom mid feed. It is not easy, believe me, to wait for a baby to take a break and then get up quick while grabbing a baby, dropping a Boppy, finding something to put her in and drag it quickly near the bathroom door so you can get on the toilet before.... well, you get the idea. Sometimes I can wait until she's done, or it goes away completely after, but other times it is strong. And OMG, the itching!! Why does breastfeeding make you so itchy??? It is only while you are feeding and then it stops! Crazy, right?
Also, not all moms leak. I heard stories about moms leaking onto their clothes when they skipped or were late to a feeding, or even when they are out and hear another baby crying. I have heard stories of swollen and engorged boobs. I was told early on that you knew you were empty when they felt soft. Well, the truth is that this is not true for everyone. If my baby sleeps for more that 8 hours at night, I MAY wake up from or with hard rock boobs. Though, more often than not, they are still pretty soft. Maybe not as soft as when they are completely empty, but not hard. Sometimes they hurt a little, but not bad. I also VERY rarely leak. I was lucky enough to get a whole bunch of free pads from a mom on FB, but I may never need any more than that. I wear them all the time, just in case, and since my nipples sometimes stick to my shirt and not to the pads, but I don't really NEED them. I have only started leaking 3-4 times, and every time it was after a hot, long shower.
And another thing. Who are these people that say breastfeeding is cheaper? We all have heard that it is better for the baby, and that is reason enough to try everything you can to do it, but it is NOT cheaper. Well, I have not actually done the math and each baby is different and takes different amounts at different ages and stages, but even if it is, it is not by much. You have to factor in the costs of nursing/pumping bras, tank top and shirts. The cost of breast pads and pump parts, as well as pumping bottles, replacement parts, storage bags, and, if you so choose, a way to sterilize it all (I use the Avent microwave sterilizer and LOVE it). Then there are things to help you keep up or increase your supply. This includes everything from oatmeal and Gatorade to tea, cookies and even pills if you need them. And you may not be completely on top of your nutrition, so you must continue to take prenatals to make sure your LO is still getting all the vitamins and nutrients they need. Speaking of, you also need to buy Vitamin D drops because breastfeeding does not give your LO enough Vitamin D (I highly recommend Carlson Baby's Super Daily D3 drops. One drop on your boob before feeding once a day is 100% of the daily intake requirement). And, the most important thing.... nipple ointment. It does not matter if you are just starting out, or months or years into it. At some point you will need it. Usually it is more during the first few weeks, when your body is getting used to it. But even once your nipples adjust and stop cracking and bleeding, they can still dry out or become sore at any time. As your baby grows, they can go longer or cluster feed, which can do a number on your poor little nipples. I really love Motherlove Nipple Cream because it dries quickly, a small amount goes a long way, it helps them heal quickly and it doesn't smell bad. Also, Lanolin may not be safe for babies to ingest (it is still being tested and studied) so anything organic is a good idea.
What have you experienced? Did I miss anything? Leave a comment and help other Mama's with their journey....
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